An Essex Wife

Afternoon Tea At Hanbury Manor

AnEssexWife — Fri, 17 May 2013 07:24:20 +0000

I recently treated my wonderful MIL to Afternoon Tea at Hanbury Manor for an afternoon of relaxation and girly chit chat.

Am I the BEST daughter-in-law ever or what??

The grounds at Hanbury Manor are breath-taking, This stately 17th century Jacobean style country house, set in 200 acres of spectacular Hertfordshire countryside, is the perfect location for a girly lunch or family celebration.

The food was amazing. The cucumber sandwiches were served on a bread infused basil (which I could have eaten 100 times over), and the scones were served warm with the most deliciously sweet jam. I was in ‘lady that lunches’ heaven.

The staff were attentive, yet not over the top. We both felt very comfortable, relaxed and throughly enjoyed our afternoon. We spent most of the time plotting reasons to return.

Post indulgence we couldn’t resist a little sneaky peek around the hotel and spa, it certainly lived up to exceptions.

I think I may have to return sooner rather than later to try out the treatment rooms. For, like, blogging purposes of course.

The things I do for my readers! *cough*

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Infidelity – An Open Letter To The Secret Blogger

AnEssexWife — Wed, 15 May 2013 07:08:10 +0000

Dear Secret Blogger,

Yesterday I read your post and I have to say, I was impressed with your bravery. Not many people would stick their neck on the line and say that they think sleeping with another woman’s husband is a good thing, something we should be thanking you for.

I will be honest with you, I did take to twitter to voice my opinions on this piece. I had to put it out there that I felt this post was not a positive one, and not one I expected to see promoted to a readership of parents, especially ones who may currently be dealing with infidelity and its after effects.

I was told by the @tots100 twitter person that they were not promoting your lifestyle choices, but supporting the fairness of free speech.

So in order for me to express my ideas (and one that you may not agree with), I would like to tell you a little story.

A good few years ago there was a young girl called Kate*. She lived in a very loving home with her Mum, Dad and two younger brothers. She rode horses each weekend and, even though we teased her about it, she still like to take 3 Carebears to bed with her each evening.

Since the age of 6, her family would go to their summer home in Cornwall for three weeks during the school holidays. Her and her brothers would spend every waking hour hanging off their fathers every word. He was their hero. He taught them how to crab, how to bodyboard, how to build fires on the beach. I was always so jealous of those holidays.

He was a hard-working man, but always made it home for two family dinners week. Sundays were filled with a family walk and a huge roast dinner. Kate’s mum’s cooking always bought people together. As she put the food on the table Kate’s dad would open the wine, always pouring his wife a glass first and saying she deserved it for how well she looked after him.

Just after Kate started senior school things changed. Her father was home less and less for family dinners. Sundays were not the same, her dad always seamed to be preoccupied. Their family walks were often canceled due to her father having to ‘pop out’.

She noticed her Mum looked tired too, and she was sure that sometimes she could hear her crying in the bathroom when she was in bed.

Then one, nondescript, Thursday afternoon Kate came home from school to be told by her mother that her dad would no longer be living in their house. That he was moving into a hotel. That life as they knew it was over.

Her mother, unable to hide her emotions anymore, broke down in Kate’s arms. She had no one other to turn to than her 13 year old daughter. She poured her heart out, telling Kate how her dad had been having dinner with a lady from his office on the nights he said he was working late. He had been having an affair. On the times he said he was working away he was really in a hotel with her. That he had told his wife he loved her more as a friend these days than a wife.

Now, secret blogger, I don’t know if you can remember being 13, but its a horrible age. You don’t know where you fit in the world at the best of times, but throw a marriage break down and your mother falling apart into the mix and it really can mess with your head.

The Care-bears when straight in the bin, they were a present from her loving father after all. A man she now felt she didn’t know. Her hero who was now a villain.

Kate’s teenage years went by in a blur of weekend visits to her dad’s, now in a lovely apartment but a broken man living with the shame and guilt of what he had done, and mopping up the tears of her mother who now, unable to trust anyone, was a lonely and bitter lady lacking the drive to be a positive role model for her children.

In her adult years Kate’s bed hopping made her realised she had issues with men, and she knew she had to ask her Dad the question that had been burning away in her head for so long.

Why?

Why did you hurt my mum? Why did you ruin my childhood? Why did you let me down?

There were tears, confessions and once again an overwhelming about of guilt. Her father told her that he was bored in his marriage. That things had become stale and repetitive. That he found a lady in his office that he clicked with and got caught up in the moment. He said he wished she had rejected him, or a least not pursed him. That he was weak and took what he saw as the easy option. A way to have the best of both worlds. He said he never wanted his wife to find out, that he had never planned to leave. He just wanted to put some spice back in his life.

But he did get caught, and he had no choice but to leave, and the ‘other woman’ didn’t want anything serious, so she walked away too.

He lost everything, and she moved on to her next married man.

Now, I’m not judging your life choices. I know many people who have, in one way or another, got involved with married men. It happens.

What I take offense to is your brazen attitude that we should be thankful for this. We should see your infidelity as a public service.

If my husband felt trapped/bored/dissatisfied our marriage I feel he is two options. Talk to me about it or leave and make a new life of his own. There is no option 3. There is no ‘stay with me for the nice home, children and cooked meals and find some other woman to get your kicks from’.

You say you have children. How would feel, if when they grow up, someone cheats on your daughter or you lose access to your grandchildren as your son has an affair and divorces his wife?

I admire how you make your life work to suit your needs, that you have the balls to go out there and think ‘bollocks to the haters’.

What I don’t admire however is how, in order to do that, you have to risk the happiness of adults and children you have never met, people who have never done anything wrong towards you, and how you feel this is something that we, as the married female population, should be thanking you for.

I hope all works out for you and life makes you happy. I just hope it’s not my husband you are sleeping with.

An Essex Wife

*Kate’s name has been changed to protect my friends identity, as I am aware some people who know me in ‘real life’ do read my blog.

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Aldi Nappy Challenge

AnEssexWife — Tue, 14 May 2013 19:38:02 +0000

A few weeks back I travelled to London to attend an Aldi Mamia event. Was lovely to catch up with some fab fellow bloggers, and especially great to finally have a proper face to face chat with Ryan from Transatlantic Blonde – a lady who I have admired for many years.

The event gave us a great insight into the Mamina range. I never realised how many different baby products Aldi stocked, and at such reasonable prices.

As part of the follow-up to the event I have been asked to trial their own brand Mamia nappies for one month in replace of the nappies I use and to blog my journey and findings.

I am a little bit of a flirt when it comes to nappies, buying whatever is on offer in order to keep the costs down. The way I look at it is they are used to hold wee and poo, so there is no point splashing out on them!

I heard some people at the event saying they found on brand work better than another, or certain nappies arent fit for purpose. I personally have never found this. I have even used the Tesco value nappies and found they worked perfectly well.

The nappies I have been asked to road test are the Size 4′s from the Mamia range, priced at just £4.49 for a pack of 48. Aldi say

Aldi’s Mamia Nappies and Baby Wipes offer quality and reassurance for parents at a great price. With awards such as the Loved By Parents ‘Best Wipes’, Mother & Baby’s ‘Best Wipes’ and Prima Baby & Pregnancy’s 2013 Reader Awards for ‘6+ older baby nappy’, mums can be assured their little ones are getting the best possible care and guaranteed quality with Mamia.

With such a plethora of awards to their name I am holding out high hopes for these nappies. I will be sure to keep you posted on how I’m getting on.

Disclaimer – I have been sent the nappies free of charge for the purpose of this review.

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April – Our Month In Photos

AnEssexWife — Wed, 08 May 2013 10:18:55 +0000

Its been a lovely month that has seen the return of the sunshine and us celebrate our second wedding anniversary.

Here is our month in photos…

We visited London….

We had operations…

We went on trains…

We played in the park…

We ran Marathons…

We walked on beaches…

We went sightseeing…

We had great fun….what did you do this month?

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A Visit To Flatford Bridge Cottage and Flatford Mill

AnEssexWife — Wed, 08 May 2013 10:04:11 +0000

It was over 2nd wedding anniversary last week and we decided to treat ourselves to a child-free break to celebrate. We stayed in The Pier Hotel, Hariwch the night before and then enjoyed the day together in Frinton, Flatford and Dedham. I had a wonderful time with a wonderful man, I’m a very lucky girl.

I have already blogged about our stay at The Pier and our morning walk in Frinton, now here is the next part of our adventures…

Whenever we go away I like to try to make use of our National Trust membership. For a while now I had been wanting to visit Flatford as people kept telling me how much I would love it, so staying so close by the night before it seamed silly not to go.

From the moment we arrived and walked down towards the river I was in love. It’s just so beautiful. We first had a look round the John Constable exhibition and then took a stroll down to Flatford Mill to see the location of his famous painting, The Hay Wain.

Making sure we are in the right spot…

The scene of The Hay Wain

I had heard rumor of a tearoom located back up by the visitor centre so we headed off to find it.

It was set on the river, overlooking a pontoon where cute rowing boats can be hired. Being the silly people that we are we didn’t have any cash on us to hire a boat, but in a way I was glad as this is now a good excuse to go back and visit again with the children.

We had such a lovely time walking around together chatting and enjoying each others company, I really do love spending some one on one time with my darling man.

For more information on Flatford Bridge Cottage and Flatford Mill visit the National Trust website.

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A Letter To My Darling Husband – Happy Anniversary

AnEssexWife — Fri, 03 May 2013 11:18:55 +0000

2 years ago I said ‘I Do’ to the man of my dreams. We don’t really ‘do’ presents so here is my way of saying ‘thank you’ for the most amazing two years.

Dearest Rob,

Do you remember the day we first met? We were on the train to Leeds to watch Orient be robbed of 3 points. Who would have thought just two years later we’d be married?

Our time together had been a whirlwind, but I wouldn’t change a second of it. You have made my life complete. You’ve given me a family, a home, and simply a reason to make every day count. There will never be enough words or kisses in the world to thank you for the amazing life you have given me.

Our wedding day was perfect. The sun was shining, our friends and family where there, Scarlett was on her best behavior and Baby Essex bump was neatly hidden under my dress and her scan photo tucked away in my bag.

We laughed, we cried and my goodness did we dance!!

In the two years that have passed I have remembered every day just how lucky I am to have married my best friend. We adore being together. You makes me laugh, you’re amazing father and I know, no matter what, you will always be here for me. You are my rock.

Don’t get too smug though, you still drive me crazy everyday. You are the worlds worst at remembering to buy cards and presents, the most unromantic person I know and have an amazing knack of always saying the wrong thing.

Yet you makes me feel warm inside every time I look you, and I still get me goosebumps whenever you kiss me.

I love how you always gives me a weather report for tomorrow when we go to bed, how you claim to not like chic flicks yet watch them with a smile on you face, how you watch football with me every night of the week and how you understand, due to my own childhood issues, why being a steady, loving family for our girls is my most important goal in life

Those are the things that matter to me. Those are the things that will keep us together when we are old and grey.

I love that we both have the mantra that a marriage takes work. It’s not a guaranteed happily ever after, you have to invest time and effort into making it work. Passion and romance may fade, its our friendship that will ensure we stand the test of time.

Rob, you are still my most favorite person in the world to spend time with. Everything seems so much better when you are by my side. I have so much more fun when I share things with you. You are my world.

So today, and everyday, I just want to say thank you to my darling Langers. Thank you for putting up with me, humoring me, forgiving me and loving me. You make me a better person by just being by my side.

Its been two years since we said ‘I do’, and everyday I am so glad we did!

I love you.

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A Seaside Stroll In Frinton

AnEssexWife — Fri, 03 May 2013 10:25:41 +0000

It was over 2nd wedding anniversary last week and we decided to treat ourselves to a child-free break to celebrate. We stayed in The Pier Hotel, Harwich the night before and then enjoyed the day together in Frinton, Flatford and Dedham. I had a wonderful time with a wonderful man, I’m a very lucky girl.

I have already blogged about our stay at The Pier, now here is the second part of our adventures…

After breakfast we decided to drive the short distance to Frinton for a morning walk to blow away the cobwebs, and to ease the guilt of the 1 million calories I had consumed thanks to the amazing food at The Pier.

I love the British seaside, and walking along the front at Frinton is one of the places where I feel the most happiest in the world. To me it is what real seaside towns should be like. I love how old-fashioned and quaint it is. No gaudy amusement arcades or groups of hen and stag doos. Just people walking around enjoying their surroundings, appreciating how lucky they are that places like this still exist.

My other favorite pastime when in Frinton is indulging myself in a spot of beach hut envy.

Is there anything more British that a beach hut? One at Frinton is right at the top if my ‘Lottery List’.

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The Pier, Harwich – A Review

AnEssexWife — Wed, 01 May 2013 19:18:39 +0000

It was our 2nd wedding anniversary last week and we decided to treat ourselves to a child-free break to celebrate. We stayed in The Pier Hotel, Hariwch the night before and then enjoyed the day together in Frinton, Flatford and Dedham. I had a wonderful time with a wonderful man, I’m a very lucky girl.

Here is the first part of our adventures…

The first part of our wedding anniversary break was spent at The Pier in Harwich. I love the Milsons Hotel group, we have stayed with then in the past at their other properties and always had a wonderful time.

The Pier Hotel is set right on the waterfront at the very British seaside town of Harwich. Harwich is a place that holds very happy memories for me. It is where my beloved aunt and uncle live and where both my girls have had their first feel of sand between their toes. Being so close to Walton and Frinton it often gets overlooked, but I think people don’t know what they are missing.

The town is a real working port. With ferries and cruise-liners leaving many times a day I never fail to be amazed by the size of the ships that go past. It is also one of the best places to go for fresh fish, you couldn’t get restaurants closer to where the fish is landed if you tried!

The hotel its self is as part of the coastline as the Ha’Penny Pier and docks, composed of two listed buildings loving restored by Milsoms to their former glory.

Our room was great; very spacious, with the most comfortable bed and a view that took my breath away.

The view from our bedroom window at sunset

Before dinner we popped round the corner to meet my Aunt and Uncle for a quick drink in The Alma, a very quaint local pub that I have become extremely fond of over the years and one I certainly recommend trying out if you are ever in the area.

After a quick catch up over a couple of G&Ts we headed back to The Pier to have dinner. We ate in the downstairs Bistro as the upstairs restaurant is closed on Monday and Tuesday evening. It’s a lovely relaxed dining area with wonderful views over the water and very attentive staff.

Spanish Omelet

I had a Spanish omelet to start and a spiced aubergine dish for my main while Rob had a 70′s style prawn cocktail followed by a fully loaded burger. The food, as I have come to expect from any Milsons restaurant, was fantastic. I could have eaten my starter about ten times over.

Spiced Aubergine and Chapati

For dessert I had a chocolate pot with warm cookies and marshmallows. It was divine, a melt in your mouth taste explosion.

After dinner we took the rest of wine up to our room and, as it was almost midnight, opened our cards and reminisced about all the amazing things that have happened in our first two years of marriage.

It was the perfect way to start our anniversary.

If you would like to find out more about staying at The Pier, Harwich visit www.milsomhotels.com

Disclaimer – we were given the stay free of charge for the purpose of this review but the views expressed are all my own.

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Has Spring Finally Sprung?

AnEssexWife — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 08:33:38 +0000

The sun has been shining. It was long overdue. After all the snow and rain I was worried it may never shine again.

Last Wednesday we spent all day in the park on a play-date. It was only going to be a quick visit, but we stayed so long that I had to make a quick dash to the shops to pick up picnic bits mid way though the afternoon.

It was Orlaith’s first time in the park since finally learning to walk. She loved the new-found freedom that had been acquired. Although I had forgotten how many eyes are needed in the back of your head with a toddler on the move.

After all this fresh air dinner was devoured and bed was calling them by 6pm, now that’s a benefit that could help sell the ‘active childhood’ agenda.

After a such a wonderful day, would I be getting totally ahead of myself in wondering ‘has Spring finally sprung?’

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26.2 miles…..

AnEssexWife — Mon, 22 Apr 2013 19:35:51 +0000

I think my husband is all kinds of awesome. 26 miles he ran this weekend, thats one thing ticked off the bucket list.

He is quite simply amazing, a hero in the eyes of me and my girls.

We saw him three times along the route and welled up each time.

When he called to say he had finished I couldn’t help the tears from falling. I was so relieved it was over, and so proud of all he had achieved.

We had a wonderful day in London with our friends, my darling girls were little angels (baby Essex even had an hours nap at the side of the road) and Scarlett was jumping up and down with joy each time she saw her Daddy ran past.

London did itself proud this weekend. Once sign I saw along the route summed it up perfectly for me…

Run if you can, walk if you must, but finish for Boston

26.2 miles – rather him than me!!

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An Essex Wife

Afternoon Tea At Hanbury Manor

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